WOW… OK YES I am not 100% at my best and I have just come back to Sidney from 10 solid days of clearing, sorting, packing and selling my partners Mom’s homes belongings. And before I left I was selling, packing and sorting my stuff and now I have this week to finish my packing, sorting and selling!!! Jesus!!! What a time of being busy but also being in a world that is so hostile and angry, people who will throw you under the bus at any opportunity. Day to day happenings aren’t happening because I get harassed so badly when I say I have a medical exemption from wearing a mask that I rarely go anywhere anymore because I don’t have my legal file all in order yet because I am having to move. Another horrible thing that happened to me because of a horrible person!!!
My spiritual studies are really calling me to a place of higher realms of love… I am sad and sorry to say I have not graduated from this level as of yet. I still am very angry at the landlord here for being such an asshole to me and being able to push me into moving at this time of my life! I can’t lie I wish him horrible things right now and my work is to either feel fine with me wishing these things or to be able to see that he is so badly wounded that he doesn’t know how to be a good/kind person and to send him love anyways. Well I have my work cut out for me because I don’t feel peace in any of this as of yet.
On another note I truly did not think I had it in me to move let alone deal with my partners Mom’s belongings too. And as well as the landslides here on the island that put gas restrictions and inspired a whole group of hoarders to buy out groceries and supplies here igniting a BIG ENERGY of lack and scarcity WHICH I can say my work here is pretty darn EXCELLENT! I did not get on the hoarders train to rush out to buy everything in extreme amounts leaving not enough for others. Does it make me mad, I cannot lie, YES it does. And I went to work on believing that I will be cared and looked after no matter what is happening in the 3D reality. This reality does not make me who I am it actually helps to define me to become the best human I can be in such devastating times.
Resilience, strength, determination, focus and not giving up are the key traits I am forming and integrating right now. I didn’t think I could do it and I am doing it!!! WOW I HAVE FOUND A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF STRENGTH, DETERMINATION, RESILIENCE, FOCUS AND NOT GIVING UP I DID NOT KNOW I HAD! I am not done yet but I have accomplished so much more than I thought I ever could!