Many Blessings and Love to you all.
WOW what a journey we are on! I started this path 20 years ago, and this may be a shock to some of you but I was a hard core addict. My immune system was in complete shut down, I was catching every little bug, virus and flu that was going around, finding myself bed ridden and unable to go anywhere after many years of chronic alcohol, cigarettes, cocaine & crack, crystal meth, marijuana and e over-useage. My doctor diagnosed me with a rare white blood cell disorder and also found an unusual disorder in my lungs and demanded that if I didn’t quit immediately I was going to begin to have some very severe symptoms… well it took about a year more before I finally got clean. That was back in July of 2000 when I quit everything cold turkey!
There were more issues going on than just my failing health, which turns out was directly linked to me believing that I was useless, un-loveable, not wanted, and that I was doing everything wrong. I went through alot of years with agorphobia, not being able to leave my house because of intense anxiety and panic attacks. From here I got addicted to ativan and wasn’t able to walk from one room to the next without my ativan tightly gripped in my hands. I let my daughter down so many times while in addictions, where I ended up abandoning her and leaving her with her Dad, thank God for him!!! May he always know how incredible he is, what an amazing job he did with our daughter and how deeply grateful I am for him taking care of my beautiful angel, Cayla. And I continued to let my daughter down as I struggled immensely with getting well, which I didn’t think I was going to make it through so many times. My one source of light was Cayla, my daughter, she was all I could focus on for getting well for. Until one day things began to shift. I was off ativan, changed my diet, getting all kinds of holistic treatments and learning to do my own on myself.
The path continued for a lot of years before I can say that I finally began to see some light at the end of the tunnel. And now today I continue the work everyday, staying devoted to my spiritual practice, holistic treatments, a healthy, whole food, fermented diet, exercise, time in nature, meditation and many other things.
I studied everything that I could get my hands on and my body into. It became my life and my passion. After 12 years on this path my daughter, Cayla and I opened a Cafe in Sidney, BC. It turns out the business was for her and I wasn’t to carry on business in that way anymore. So here I am 5 1/2 years later, 20 years of immense studies in the esoteric & spiritual realm, integrated practices of meditation, shamanism and holistic studies with plants and herbs, foods, fermentation, vitamin and supplements, an 8 month inner retreat under my belt to recollect my thoughts, rest, go deeper into my process and understanding how I need to show up in this world… here it is The Dharmacy. The Dharmacy is a collection of my 20 years studying, researching, practicing and living a life that seeks and implements ways of living that nourish, fulfill and align with a deeper sense of purpose and practice. To addressing our inner shadow and understanding why it is there, moving past it and finding peace, love, abundance and compassion in all of life.
I am grateful everyday for this breath that I take. I am thankful that I get to show up in life and be a Mother and Friend to my daughter, and now an Oma to my grandson and that I can share my journey with all of my friends and family.
May we all remember the simple things in life, remembering to stop and take in the gifts all around us and within us. Knowing that we are here to shine our light as brightly as we possibly can and don’t let anyone stop you. Also knowing that we are loved and that there is nothing to fix… WE ARE PERFECT, WHOLE AND COMPLETE ALREADY!!! In My Love, You Are and Ubuntu
See you in the perfect moment
So much love and blessings